


He Is

by fairyqueenmab



Category: Romeo And Juliet - All Media Types, Romeo And Juliet - Shakespeare
Genre: Angst, Canon Era, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-18
Updated: 2014-05-18
Packaged: 2018-01-24 19:57:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1615196
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairyqueenmab/pseuds/fairyqueenmab
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What Benvolio means to Mercutio and vice versa</p>
            </blockquote>





	He Is

**Author's Note:**

> Italics is Mercutio talking about Benvolio, normal is Benvolio talking about Mercutio

_He is the carefully knotted rope that keeps a boat from drifting down the river. He is a song that you sing to yourself when the dark presses in around you. He is a candle that stays lit when you are afraid. He is stepping stones in cold water that are close enough to let you cross. He is a pen that writes down your story without judgment or error. He is the fire that keeps you warm when it is cold and the breeze that lets you breathe when the heat is too much. He is a string on your finger to remind you not to forget. He is an open window when you need to escape. He is steady earth beneath your feet to keep you balanced when the winds overtake you. He is an unmoving star that guides you where you need to go._

He is that moment when the fire burns the brightest and you step back, worried that a spark will fly at you. He is a song that changes tempo and melody with every measure. He is thunder in the summer without any rain. He is a bird that flies into a window because he thought beyond it was freedom. He is rain that stings your skin. He is the water coursing over stones and rushing up the banks of the river because it will never be deep enough to hold him. He is the greatest sentence you will ever write, but he is also the one you have no place for in your story. He is a word that no one knows how to spell. He is the deer who doesn't run when the hunters come. He is golden sunlight and a dying star.

_He is warmth in the middle of the night when you feel like the world is drifting away from you. He is arms holding you together when you feel about to break. He is a hand in yours as you stumble home, tugging you back to your feet. He is eyes that meet yours without looking away. He is ears that hear your every word and a heart that cares what they are. He is a loud laugh when you are with others and a quiet one when it is only you. He is feet that follow you wherever you want to lead them. He is a shoulder to wrap your arm around in the cold of night. He is a sideways glance at you in a group of people who look straight ahead or behind. He is a weight to keep you sure when you feel as if you are about to float away. ___

He is waving arms that try to hold the universe. He is eyes that stare at something no one else can see. He is a voice which says words everyone is afraid to speak. He is an unsure whisper and a confident shout. He is laughter in the midst of tears and a sob in celebration. He is dirty feet covered in scratches. He is a twisted smile. He is hands that clutch at you and push away from others. He is bruises and fear and worry. He is words that mean a thousand different things and sentences that don't mean anything at all. He is a voice which calls you to him.

_He is footsteps behind you and a hand around your wrist. He is glimpses of his hair through the crowd. He is pulling him behind a wall and kissing him despite the people who could easily see you. He is running outside, feet kicking up dust. He is a free smile back at you when you lag behind. He is a finger on your mouth when you can't be silent. He is eyes peering through the branches. He is calloused palms keeping you balanced as you make your unsteady way home. He is a chest to rest your head on when you can't stay awake. He is a gentle touch in your hair and a loving whisper. He is a warning and a step between you and danger. He is born for war and alive for peace. ___

He is a face lit by shifting fire. He is a head tilted back and searching the sky. He is brushing past everyone you know and he is dancing ahead. He is a tight grip that tugs you forward and he is words that tell you nothing at all. He is leaping shadows that warp into monsters from stories. He is drunken laughter as he holds you close when you shouldn't be. He is not wanting to pull away. He is cleverness when your own head feels heavy. He is a brush of lips to yours as he darts forward. He is an hand reaching out to grab you as he falls. He is an arm around you that you let stay even though it is too hot to be touched. He is daring and games and youth. 

_He is tears streaming down his face as he holds you. He is gasping words forbidding you to go because he is afraid to say die. He is wide eyes staring down at where you are breaking open. He is softness and kindness and goodness that should not be hurt, and you wish he never knew you because then he wouldn't hurt. He is skin that you have not touched enough and lips that you have not kissed enough. He is hands pressing against your side, he is hands that you have ruined forever. He is a bowed head and a desperate plea. He is every day and night you had and all the ones you will never have. He is fading and you are holding onto him because he is a center for you to cling to but even he is not enough to keep you there this time. He is beautiful and he is left behind and he is going forward and you are here forever reaching for him. ___

He is eyes that won't focus on you. He is unfinished mumblings as he struggles to breathe. He is blood staining your fingers as you try to keep it inside of him. He is a sharp laugh that stops halfway through when he starts coughing. He is suddenly afraid. He is suddenly all too mortal. He is embers and mist and charcoal now. He is hands clutching at you that can't hold on. He is darkness on his clothing and the streets that you are pulling him off of because you will _not _let him leave you in the dust and dirt. He is broken skin and spreading redness and a mouth that won't stop making jokes until it does and he is silent. He is silent and you don't know what to do because he is never silent, he is light and he is noise and he is music. He is brightness pulling you into the sun when you get stuck in the shadows, and now it's not so much that you're stuck there but that shadows is all there is. He is a frantic search for a pulse. He is eyelids that you need to touch, you need to close because right now he is eyes that are staring at you without seeing you.__

He is a cold space beside you in your bed. He is empty air when you turn to say something to him. He is streets and rooms that don't look the way they did when he was there with you. He is an awkward pause in a conversation because that's when he is supposed to speak. He is screaming words inside your mind because you can't say these things if he is not here to listen. He is shutting your eyes and seeing him falling over and over and over again. He is looking down at your palms and seeing that red as if it's still there so much later. He is not knowing what to do with your hands anymore. He is crying and shaking in the nighttime and a blank look in the day. He is, he is, he is, he is.

**Author's Note:**

> i have never been so embarrassed about anything i've ever written, this started as a character study  
> also holy crap i never write canon era stuff  
> or angst


End file.
